A Dark And Stormy Night

Bob Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing in Europe... as it happens, near Transylvania. They were driving in a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late and raining very hard. Bob could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly, the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail! The car swerves and smashes into a tree.

Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his wife unconscious, with her head bleeding! Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to get her medical assistance.

Bob carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road. After a short while, he sees a light. He heads towards the light, which is coming from a large, old house. He approaches the door and knocks.

A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts, "Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife Betty. We've been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?"

"I'm sorry," replied the hunchback, "but we don't have a phone. My master is a doctor; come in, and I will get him!"

Bob brings his wife in.

An older man comes down the stairs. "I'm afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor; I am a scientist. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had a basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory."

With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely. Igor places Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries, so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table.

After a brief examination, Igor's master looks worried. "Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion."  Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty Hill are no more.

The Hills' deaths upset Igor's master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his grand piano. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills the house.

Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. His eyes catch movement, and he notices the fingers on Betty's hand twitch, keeping time to the haunting piano music. Stunned, he watches as Bob's arm begins to rise, marking the beat! He is further amazed as Betty and Bob both sit up straight!

Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory.

He bursts in and shouts to his master:


 

"Master, Master!...The Hills are alive with the sound of music!"

 

Good one...sounds like a Michael Jackson video.

Yea you were right that was a bad one!

Uhhhhh.  yea.   

Holy Crap, a new site, and you start with that. You have guts.
Ride safe all.
Greg

45 seconds of my life I'll never get back. 

Don't say that I didn't warn you guys! This was the only joke that I had in my e-mail at the time.

Sorry fellers.

Don't say that I didn't warn you guys! This was the only joke that I had in my e-mail at the time.

Sorry fellers.

Put it back! Please.

ouch!

ohh that's scary! 

I can't help but think of antique jokes, the punch lines went "I left my harp in Sam Frank's disco". And "There's No Plate like Chrome for the Holandaise"

I think I'll  now.

Rick

Come on Rick, this is good stuff.

Why was the house plant thrown in jail?  It was potted.

tough crowd...

Old, but classic

Hitler finds out they dragged knee before him at GMR.

ok, I'll do one more...

*** Adult Truths ***

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than with Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.  (Ladies... Quit Laughing!!)

Old, but classic

Hitler finds out they dragged knee before him at GMR.

Maybe it's old but I've never seen it. I have tears from laughing so hard.   

Those vids always crack me up. Thanks!

And for those of us in Tech Support, let's remember way back when Books were new...
Introducing the book (repost)

But I wasn't alive when this Call came in but I bet you know someone who was!

I didn't see the video but is that the one with Hitler and staff in the bunker. The original movie was named Downfall, and there are about a gazillion (technical term) videos with different themes and different sub- titles. One of the all- time greats was 'They got Hitler the wrong bike' or something very similar: it is about Hitler's staff buying him a BMW to replace a Honda without his knowledge. Those videos have all been removed from U tube due to copyright infringement (the Germans don't see nearly as much humor in those re-dubs as Americans and Brits do) but they are still floating all around the 'Net. Absolutely worth the couple of minutes to watch it.

Brian

Maybe it's old but I've never seen it. I have tears from laughing so hard.   

Those vids always crack me up. Thanks!

I can't help but think of antique jokes, the punch lines went "I left my harp in Sam Frank's disco". And "There's No Plate like Chrome for the Holandaise"

I think I'll  now.

Rick

Then there's the local favorite: "Only Hugh can stop florist friars" 

Sorry Rabbi, kicks are for trids.