wife has fear of death if I continue to ride, What to do?

[skeet]

Well the wife is a bit upset over my recent crash, understandable. It has caused us to change our summer plans somewhat. I am laid up with a tib/fib break and several more weeks before I can even start to walk again.
Yesterday she is questioning me regarding my need to ride.
She is constantly feeling that the next ride will be my last and she has gone as far as to consider how she should raise our kids alone. To me this is taking her fear too far but I have a different perspective of the risk.
Of course for me I want to get back on the bike as soon as I can and she wants me to take a break for awhile.
I think taking a break until next summer is fine. I just feel that as soon as I get back on the bike she will continue to have the same fear and we will be back in the same boat. 
Any of you guys had to deal with similar issue and how did you resolve it, if it got resolved?
How can I pacify her fear?
Thanks,
Wayne

[snarf]

Show her the statistics for automobile injuries/deaths in a year. Then tell her you want to buy a sports-car.
Either that or get a million dollar life ins policy; my wife would carry me out to my bike grinning all the way.

[Pokey]

Life is full of risk, you could break your neck in the shower.

[wally_games]

Wife used to ride with me all the time. We got out of riding for quite a number of years. Then more recently, we went on a couple of lunch rides borrowing one of my friend's bike. Then, one day when I was out running around on my neighbor's son's FZ6, I had a wreck. Left the road and low-sided on a curve. Nothing too terribly horrible, but it was a crash. I obviously bought the bike, got it up and running again, and rode it for about a year before selling it to buy my Connie in March 2011.

Now she will not ride, will not even sit on the bike, will not touch the bike, will not even discuss motorcycles, and asks me to always call her when I get wherever I'm going so that she knows I'm alive. Oh, and she raised my life insurance policy.

Life is a risky business. Enjoy it while you can. If wife's un-enjoyment of your riding is a bigger issue to you than your riding enjoyment, sell it and find a new hobby that she will enjoy with you.

[sherob]

How many people thought going to see a movie at midnight would be so dangerous?  Life has it's risks... if you're going to be afraid of death, you might as well never leave your house. 

Live life to it's fullest... you only have one. (unless you're the Dalai Lama or Shirley Maclaine )

[Nosmo]

Everytime this question is raised, I repost this article.  Make of it what you will:

From local newspaper, several years ago:

SOUTH BEND, IND.

Tree crashes through roof, kills man watching TV in bed

   A large tree limb crashed through a roof and killed a man in his bed.
   Police called to the home of David Wetzel, 41, on Wednesday night found a branch 3 feet to 5 feet in diameter lying across the man’s chest.
   The tree appeared to be healthy, and investigators did not immediately know what caused the limb to fall.
   “It is just one of those unforeseen, tragic events,” said Jaimee Thirion, a spokeswoman for the Sheriff’s Department. “It was not storming, and the wind was hardly blowing.”
   Wetzel’s wife and son were also home at the time but were not hurt.  His wife told officers she was in the kitchen and her husband was watching television in bed.

[Conrad]

Did you try the ole 'if I crashed in my car I wouldn't stop driving would I' argument?

[pistole]

- can relate to this.

- my only contribution : its a matter of trust. Ie , the family trusts you to go out safely each time on your motorcycle. You in turn must return that trust by being responsible and riding within your abilities.

.

[Strawboss]

I understand you posing the question here, but really, only you know what you are going to do when you do it. Only you know your wife. She has a rational fear, she does not want to lose you, she does not want to see you hurt or suffer, she knows how safe you ride, she knows the stats, she knows what gear you wear, she knows all the anologies and buzz phrases,  trying to talk to her using these facts and phrases will be patronizing and most likely counterproductive to future relations between you two. If you ride will she leave? Will it cause problems at home? Children involved? Hard choices. You will choose when the time comes. I do not relish your position, but I understand it and wish you luck.

[ZG]

I’ve had a couple dozen bikes now in the past 25+ years, I even raced for a couple years, but had a pretty bad wreck racing that laid me up for quite a bit, and mama wasn’t too excited about me getting back on a bike again… 
 
So I got into Porsches and had 5 of those, trading up every year+ or so (and yes costly mods on all of them)… 
 

 

 

 

 

 
When the economy started taking a dump about 5 years ago or so we looked at ways to cut some cost out of our budget, so I sold my 02 turbo Carrera and got back into bikes with mama’s happy to save $$ blessing, bikes are far cheaper than Porsches… 
 
I’ve now had about a half dozen more bikes now in the past 5 or so years and mama doesn’t even balk at the low cost of em and even the cost to mod them, and she loves that insurance is cheap!! 
 
Moral to the story, go get into a much more expensive hobby for awhile, mama will gladly point you back to bikes to save $$... 
 
 

[pistole]

- unless the above post is tongue-in-cheek , it misses the point by a fair bit.

.

[Strawboss]

We are all different. If it works for ZG and his wife, then they pass a critical test that many don't in marriage. 

[Conrad]

I understand you posing the question here, but really, only you know what you are going to do when you do it. Only you know your wife. She has a rational fear, she does not want to lose you, she does not want to see you hurt or suffer, she knows how safe you ride, she knows the stats, she knows what gear you wear, she knows all the anologies and buzz phrases,  trying to talk to her using these facts and phrases will be patronizing and most likely counterproductive to future relations between you two. If you ride will she leave? Will it cause problems at home? Children involved? Hard choices. You will choose when the time comes. I do not relish your position, but I understand it and wish you luck.

 

[ZG]

We are all different. If it works for ZG and his wife, then they pass a critical test that many don't in marriage.

In 2 weeks we'll have been married for 21 years and still going strong! 

[stevewfl]

Man wow wish I could "provide my 2 cents worth" but I'll just add single life is being very good to me 

[snarf]

In 2 weeks we'll have been married for 21 years and still going strong! 

  Congrats....I've been married for so long that I dont even look both ways when I cross the street

[skeet]

Thanks guys the input is appreciated,
She seems to get it that I could die taking a walk to the store or driving a car or thousands of other things. She feels that the motorcycle is an unnecessary risk that I take and she considers it selfish that I do it without consideration for the family. But motorcycles is the only thing I do outside of the family.
Hopefully I can convince her that if I take some advanced riding course or something that will her easy her fears. Just need to find a way to lower her anxiety level a bit when I ride.

[Jeremy Mitchell]

An advanced rider course/track day might help placate your wife a little, but more importantly it will give you your confidence back to ride safely without second guessing your self when the time comes ride again. 

Not saying you don't have confidence in your riding skills, but I know after my low side that it felt good to re-confirm my skill in a closed course environment.

[Conrad]

Does your wife have any interest in riding herself? What if you both took a MSF course together?

[gpzrocker]

When my family is done with my riding, we are buying a dune buggy/rail buggy. Maybe before.